#20 - Images That I've Wanted to Use in a Top 5

Top 5: Images That I've Wanted to Use in a Top 5

1. Sexual Harassment Panda
2. Chris "The Birdman" Anderson
3. "Wheelchair-Basketball Players Stunned By Thunderous Slam Dunk"
4. Flaming Bag Head
5. Haley Joel Osment's Mug Shot

Sexual Harassment Panda is one of the greatest one-shot cartoon characters of all time. I couldn't think of a reason to include him in another Top 5, so he ends up here with the rest of the humorous, yet unique images.
The Birdman is the "the biggest disgrace in NBA history". (Ouch) In the 2005 NBA dunk contest, he missed his first eight dunk attempts (13 total misses on 2 dunks). It's still entertaining to hear how Anderson began the contest by telling a sideline reporter: "It's time for the Birdman to fly." The Birdman topped off his career by being kicked out of the league for being caught using heroin. What will he do next?
The Onion (www.theonion.com) is humor at its best. This "headline" made me laugh for hours.
The Flaming Bag Head: I'm not sure where this image came from, but I still like it.
Haley Joel Osment was "charged with drunk driving and marijuana possession after he crashed his 1996 Saturn station wagon while returning home from a Los Angeles concert in July 2006." I think this one speaks for itself.

#19 - Disappointments of My Lifetime

Top 5: Disappointments of My Lifetime

1. The Matrix Reloaded - Worst Sequel to a Quality Film
   
2. Sea-Monkeys -Blatant False Advertising
3. The Spaghetti Incident? - Worst Follow-up
4. The Segway - Worst World Revolutionizing Invention
5. Rafael Araujo - Biggest Disappointment of a Human

The Matrix Reloaded was sooooo bad. I remember while leaving the theater, people were knocking over garbage cans in disgust. Todd Chapman gave the movie screen the finger. Everyone went home angry and disapointed. Fuck the Matrix Reloaded...

Sea-Mokeys may be fond memories for some, but not for me. Brine shrimp? I want my scary little pink sea people with crowns!!

The Spaghetti Incident? was Guns N' Roses follow up to Use Your Illusion I & II. Back in the day, we were all GNR fans. Don't Cry, November Rain, Civil War, Live and Let Die, Yesterdays, Knockin on Heaven's Door, Get in the Ring, Estranged, You Could Be Mine... Use Your Illusion was one of the most important albums of the 90s. You can now buy The Spaghetti Incident for 1 cent on Ebay:

http://cgi.ebay.ca/1-CENT-CD-GUNS-N-ROSES-The-Spaghetti-Incident-MINT_W0QQitemZ300017822416QQihZ020QQcategoryZ307QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

The Segway was supposed to be the next invention to change our world. Dean Kamen said this invention would revolutionize our lives. I can remember sitting in rez and guessing what "it" would be. A matter transporter? Food replicators? What did we get? A bunch of dorks on scooters.

Rafael Araujo: A terrible waste of a human, he was also a pretty crappy basketball player.

#18 - Michael Jackson Songs

Top 5: Michael Jackson Songs

1. Billie Jean
2. Thriller
3. Smooth Criminal
4. Beat It
5. Bad

Billie Jean has one of the greatest bass lines ever written. That aside, the song is brilliant all the way through and introduced the world to the moonwalk. Thriller comes in a close second. It was the title track of his greatest album and gave us the greatest music video of all time. Zombies dancing in unison...what more could you ask for? Billie Jean gave us the moonwalk, but Smooth Criminal gave us the lean. I had an idea how they did it in the video, but could never figure out how he did it live.... until now:

http://www.smooth-criminal.com/the-professor-45.htm

Damn he was a clever man.

Beat It and Bad are almost tied in my opinion. Both were solid hits and had memorable videos.

Honorable mentions: Black or White if you like his new stuff and I Want You Back if you like his really old stuff that he didn't write.

#17 - Top 5 Simpsons Characters (Non-Family)

Top 5: Simpsons Characters (Non-Family)

1. Ralph Wiggum
2. Sideshow Bob
   
3. Mr. Burns
4. Troy McClure
5. Duffman

First off, I'm sorry that this has become a weekly blog. I wanted to keep up the pace, but maintaing the daily photo blog and this blog was impossible. I'll just make sure to only pick the best topics for the weekly Top 5. On with the show!

Ralph has always been a memorable and entertaining character. If anyone wants to argue, I have 4 words for you: "I bent my Wookie."

Sideshow Bob has been the focus of some of the best Simpsons episodes. Kelsey Grammer always does a great job and ensures a great show everytime he appears.

Mr. Burns is a classic character that you can't imagine the show without. I love every episode that shows how feeble he is.

Tory McClure makes the list to gives props to Phil Hartman. It's been 8 years since he died, and we all still miss him.

Some might wonder why Duffman made the list at #5. I wanted to put Moe there, but lets be honest, it just wouldn't be very Moe to let him on the list.

Moe Szyslak: The saddest cartoon character ever.

Honorable mention:

Hans Moleman

Uter

Inanimate Carbon Rod

Zutroy

Day 16 - Tarantino Films

Top 5: Tarantino Films

1. Pulp Fiction
2. Kill Bill: Volume 1
3. CSI: Buried Alive (Parts 1 and 2)
4. Reservoir Dogs
5. Kill Bill: Volume 2

Pulp Fiction is one of the greatest contibutors to pop culture. The film gave us numerous quotable lines:

Fabienne: Whose motorcycle is this?
Butch: It's a chopper baby.
Fabienne: Whose chopper is this?
Butch: It's Zed's.
Fabienne: Who's Zed?
Butch: Zed's dead baby.... Zed's dead.

It also inspired one of the best Springfield episodes: 22 Short Films About Springfield

Kill Bill:Volume 1 was a great action/adventure film that my dad argues did a better job capturing the essence of Japaense culture than Memoirs of a Geisha. It was interesting from start to finish, and if you don't like the film because of the outrageous anmounts of blood, you simply didn't get it.

C.S.I.: Buried Alive was a short film that will go down in history as the greatest episodes of CSI ever. It was shocking and brilliant. Don't argue.

Reservoir Dogs is a classic and started at #2, and kept slipping..Maybe I just need to watch it again to remind myself how much I loved it:

Mr. Pink: Why can't we pick our own colors?
Joe: No way. Tried it once. It doesn't work. You get four guys all fightin' over who gets to be Mr. Black. They don't know each other, so nobody wants to back down. No way. I pick. You're Mr. Pink.

Day 15 - 80s Cartoon Villains

Top 5: 80s Cartoon Villains

1. Megatron
2. Skeletor
3. Serpentor
4. Dr. Claw
5. Shredder

Ok, Keen was right.. Megatron was a villain who turned into a gun... how crazy is that? He deserves the top spot for that reason alone. Skeletor has a great design and is a truly scary villain for a 8 year old child. Serpentor showed up on G.I.Joe and kicked Cobra Commander's ass. While Cobra Commander was a joke, Serpentor was a true nemesis. Dr. Claw and Shredder were both great character designs that were dumbed down for kids. In reality, Dr. Claw would have killed Inspector Gadget in the first episode, and sold Penny off into white slavery.

Day 14 - Beatles Songs

Top 5: Beatles Songs

1. In My Life
2. Come Together
3. I Am the Walrus
4. Something
5. I Saw Her Standing There

Well Sam, here's one just for you... This was the most difficult list so far. So many good songs, and only 5 spots. I tried to fill them as follows:

Best overall song that has everything you could want in a Beatles song: In My Life
It is so beautiful and so perfect. Amazing melody, beautiful harmonies and Sir George Martin's harpsichord solo in the middle just adds to the magic of the song. I loved it the first time I heard it, and still love it to this day. I think the older I get, the more poignant the lyrics will become. I can hear those opening chords in my head, and I know I made the right choice. Hey Jude made a strong push in this category, but it seems a little worn out these days. Maybe seeing Na-Na-Na spelled out in the crowd at the Super Bowl spoiled the song for me.

Best Protest/John Lennon Song: Come Together
This song just edged out the fast version of Revolution in this category. In addition, every gig Sam and I played together, featured us doing a damn fine version of this song.

Best "lets take acid and see what happens" Song: I am the Walrus
This song is brilliant, and as cracked out as they come. The orchestra adds to the madness and genius of this tune. Ok kids, drugs are bad... unless you are a musician. Ask Ray Charles! Strawberry Fields and Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds were other close runners up in this category. Oh, and don't forget about Happiness is a Warm Gun.

Best George Harrison Song: Something
While My Guitar Gently Weeps and Here Comes the Sun are the other obvious choices. However, Something is simply too lovely to ignore.

Best Early Beatles Song: I Saw Her Standing There
Out of all their early songs, this one is my favourite. I really think it held up better over time than songs like Please Please Me and She Loves You.